Only You
by Scavanger
Summary: <html><head></head>I know what you're thinking - *another* Fanfic about Cullen/femAmell. What can I say? I couldn't resist the story here! Takes place in DA:O and WILL cross to DA2.</html>


_Disclaimer: I own none of this, and all credit must go to BioWare for characters and concept. In short, this is for fun._

Not for the first time that day Cullen felt sweat trickle down his spine, and he shifted uncomfortably in his sweltering armour. Today he was stationed in the dining room with some of his brothers - Kelvan among them - as the mages and their apprentices came to eat lunch. Naturally, some of the more senior mages took their meals in their rooms, but no one seemed to miss their presence. The great stone walls and arched ceiling echoed with the voices of the students as they spoke while they ate, their Templar guardians ever watchful.

Compassion flooded him as he surveyed the mages. Maker knew the necessity of the Chantry's place when it came to magic - one slip, and the corporeal form of the mage would be sacrificed to the wanton demons of the Fade - but Cullen had always wondered if they were too strict with the mages. Surely they could be given more privilege, more credit. Sometimes... well sometimes he felt like the Chantry was trying to gain control of the mages and the Circle.

As his amber eyes scanned the mages he found one among them that made his heart skip a beat. Even though she did not notice his scrutiny, Cullen dropped his gaze quickly, his cheeks and ears heating significantly in a blush. Against his better judgement he risked a look again and, confident that her attentions laid elsewhere, admired her.

Aleysia Amnell was often spoken of with admiration and pride. Courteous and intelligent, she was a selfless woman and humble student; the First Enchanter's star pupil and popular among the apprentices. Cullen's gaze scanned her timidly - she had delicate features and pale, ivry skin. Shapely arched eyebrows and plump lips made for kissing, indisputably the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. But it was her eyes that drew you in, a blue-grey that changed as the light caught them; from a sea tempest to the blue of mountain peaks to the grey of storm clouds.

But it was more than this that captivated Cullen. There was a strange aura about her; at once mysterious and graceful; an appalling depth to her eyes, fathomless, and would drown the unwary man. But there was a great sadness there too, just beneath the surface, a haunting sorrow that somehow separated her. In many ways she reminded him of a caged swan, beautiful and majestic, and though she lived in captivity she did not thrive. She would never be truly happy in the tower.

His heart ached as he watched her from his post. He felt torn whenever he thought of it - thought of _her - _caught between what he knew was right and what his heart yearned for. The inner turmoil since this infatuation kindled waged it's bitter war again - desire and duty, temptations and vows. And the fear of the Chantry ever learning of this obsession ever loomed over him, the consquences for his impurity and dereliction of Chantry law. The shame of being a weaker man.

The Templar turned away, lest her beauty would tear him apart completely.

In his internal war the Templar failed to notice Jowan's gaze and the intensity behind it.

* * *

><p>"Good afternoon, Kelvan." Aleysia said politely as she walked by the Templar. The man scoffed at her and turned away disdainfully, as she had expected. Kelvan was among the Templars that would be better suited to hunt apostates and maleficarum - not to mind the Circle mages. He suspected all mages to be Blood Mages-in-training, or abominations, or... Aleysia let the unpleasant thought go as Jowan came into view, smiling impishly and leading her towards the line-up for food. The smell of freshly baked bread, jams, thick chicken soup and oatmeal made her realize how hungry she was. She had missed breakfast earlier that day, her studies commanding her attentions quite thoroughly.<p>

"Hello Jowan. How have you been today? I didn't see you when I woke this morning." She inquired gently. Aleysia was usually among the mages who woke earlier than others. There was so much commotion in the morning, and she preferred to have her morning routine finished before everyone else was awake. The solitude was highly valued as well, those minutes before dawn broke the night sky were sometimes her favourite.

"I've been quite busy with my... my studies." Her friend said nervously, and Aleysia felt for him. Jowan's Harrowing would be coming soon enough, and he was likely scared. The Harrowing was never talked about in great detail with apprentices. All that Aleysia had been told was that it was very dangerous and not all the apprentices lived through the test. She had observed the preparation before one, however, her curiosity getting the better of her though she learned nothing from the information. All that she was aware of was that it involved lyrium... and templars. Gently she patted Jowan on the back, offering what comfort she could.

They collected their food and started for the tables. "I've met someone." Jowan said abruptly as he lead the way, his chocolate brown eyes glinting when he looked over his shoulder to her. Aleysia smiled genuinely for her friend's good fortunes, but a small pang of envy and sadness stabbed her. Not for Jowan himself - he was like a brother to her and Aleysia suspected the feeling was mutual. No, but that he had _found _someone at all. It would have to be another mage, as the only other people in the tower were servants and the Chantry sisters, both strictly forbidden.

"Who? Do I know her?" She asked inquisitively, looking around as if the woman would have a painted sign pointing her out. Templars lined the walls of the dining table, and Aleysia was a little surprised to find that she knew all of them by name. She went out of her way to learn the names of those around her, and most were familiar now. Many of the apprentices called out greetings to her, which she returned in kind with a small wave or the flash of a smile. A few faces watching as Jowan and she passed twisted into looks of disgust. Aleysia did her best to not let them affect her, though her stride did falter a few times.

"Probably not. I'll tell you more about her later." He sat down and she took the seat beside him. Aleysia's mother and father had both been Circle mages, and the offspring of such couplings were taking from the parents to be raised by the Chantry, and closely observed. The priests and templars watched her closer than the other orphans, and though they treated her no different outwardly, there was always a certain weariness when they interacted with her. When her magic began to manifest it seemed they had expected as much, and she was brought to the tower. Perhaps it was because she knew the templars who escorted her, or perhaps it was because the Chantry had never felt like a permenant residence, but Aleysia did not harbour the same fear and anxiety many of the children did when they first arrived to the Tower.

Still, entering a community that chafted at the Chantry's involvement - well, some factions, anyways- dressed in the robes of a Chantry orphan caused many to turn on her. The only child to take pity on her and become her friend had been Jowan, with his mop of dark brown hair and twinkling eyes. Since then they had always been close, a deep kinship forming between them. Of late he seemed more distant, but she would be too, with the Harrowing looming over her head.

As her friends spoke around her, Aleysia's eyes were drawn to the Templars and their commanding. She knew some of the mages resented the Templars and the Chantry, but Aleysia saw dedicated men and women, not the murdering visages some mages made them out to be. They had their duties as she had her's, and although some like Kelvan were more haughty and arrogant than others, some of the Templars were compassionate, and saw them more than potential abominations. Templars like... Cullen.

She stole a glance at him quickly, her heart fluttering. He was looking away, which Aleysia was eternally grateful for. He invoked feelings in her that at once excited and confused her. Aleysia turned reflective, unwittingly studying the templar. Although liaisons among the mages were largely overlooked (as long as said relations did not produce children like Aleysia) such acts between mages and any sworn to the Chantry were strictly prohibited. Knowing this, she still found herself inexorably drawn to the stuttering man. Aleysia blushed deeply when she realized where her thoughts had taking her.


End file.
